So I think I finally reached the end of my rope. Stress is killing me. I truly felt I might explode these past few days.  Moving to a new house, having intense bodily pain, being sick, having no emotional support from people I would like to have it from but support from a few friends who I do appreciate, a drunken ex-husband who abandoned his daughter again , abandoned his promise to help with our move, trying to make me as crazy as he is …….. pretend boyfriend ditched me ( again — it’s what pretend is all about) , broken physically and mentally,  hemorrhaging money ….. meanwhile working at the busiest library branch in the entire city, filled with crazies, working extra hours to afford the new house……   i know it’s not like Iraq but survival in the city can still be tough for a woman trying to take care of a child and everything else on her own … I got some Murakami to read… The Wind Up Bird Chronicle, and got some valium ….. decided just to never leave the little house for anything but work and groceries…. things are looking up.